an idiot in london


Wednesday, 24th May.
Ian fights back?

At least I have my dignity. That's what I tell myself whenever I let a train go by without even attempting to fight my way on. I watch businessmen and women, secretaries, travellers, tourists, all sorts, squash their way onto the trains every day. I refuse to stoop to that level. I'm quite happy letting a few trains go past until I can get on the train in a dignified manner.

The other thing I hate is when people push me. It really pisses me off. On the platform, on the stairs, boarding the train. I'm not going to get there any faster, people! I can only go as fast as the person in front of me!

Well today it finally happened. Somebody pushed me when I was getting on the train, and I pushed them back. In fact I pushed them off the train. They managed to squeeze their way back onto the train, and got hammered by the door as it closed. Stupid prat. There was another train arriving in one minute. ONE MINUTE.

The tube is a disgrace, but some of the imbeciles that travel on the tube aren't far behind.

And they smell.

Dear People of London, could you all please have a wash before you travel on public transport? Thank-you, from Ian.