an idiot in london


Wednesday, 9th August.
A glossary

The words of the Dawes Road Palace.

cabin fever - condition where average-looking women start to seem attractive. Example 1 working in an office with the same women all the time, they all start to become really good-looking. Example 2 Spend so much time watching TV that the ordinary looking female presenters on SkySports news start to become appealing. Unless you're talking about that foxy Dalglish chick. She's nice.
denzil - general purpose word, can mean just about anything. No longer in common usage.
fast - name given to any player whose name we can't remember but who we know is fast. Used when watching sport. Usage: "Give it to fast!"
hot hot hot hot hot hot hot - just our childish way of saying that something is hot.
kevin clout - a cricket shot. Usage: "He kevin clouted it!" Used almost exclusively by Jules.
LMF - Low Moral Fibre. There's an ad on TV here for Castlemaine XXXX. It's about a bloke who has sex with his best mate's sheila. The conclusion drawn by my flatmates is that Australians have low moral fibre.
need - extreme want. It's all about the usage: "get some need behind it, mate!"; "Oh yeah, need."
one - invitation to play one game on the Playstation, usually before resuming study. Rarely is one, often turns into three or four. Usage: "One. Come on Jules, one."
Paul - Mox's real name. Only used by his immediate family.
peter - shorter form of "Peter Asif", derived from "as if"
Youri Djorkaeff - you're joking. Also a soccer player, who in Jules' opinion is shite.